Family, friends, and colleagues gathered to celebrate the life of Paul Ditlevson Monday evening, Nov. 22, in the Miller Chapel at Ashland University. A beloved member of the AU community and a loving member of a large family, Ditlevson’s funeral service filled the chapel.

The photo slideshow that played before the service offered audience members a glimpse or a reminder of highlighted memories from Ditlevson’s life.

But the photos paled in comparison to the message sent by the large circle of family members who surrounded his casket for a final goodbye. With 10 children, 12 grandchildren and one more grandchild on the way, Ditlevson’s family was large yet closely knit, as seen by the hands held and arms stretched tightly around each other for comfort.

Rev. Bill Johnson, pastor of the local Park Street Brethren Church, led the services. Johnson said he had the privilege of being Ditlevson’s pastor for 18 months.

He began the services by sharing a message from the family.

“They want you to be honored by being here the same way you would if you had a meeting with Paul Ditlevson,” he said.

AU President Dr. Fred Finks followed Johnson with a prayer in which he asked God to bless everyone in the room the way Ditlevson had blessed them.

Their opening suited Ditlevson’s personality, based on the testimonies of the loved ones who spoke about him at the service. Johnson and Finks focused on the betterment of those who attended the service, just as Ditlevson would have.

“When he entered a room, he wasn’t one to say, ‘Here I am,’ but rather, ‘Who are you?'” said one of Ditlevson’s daughters, reading a list of favorite quotes that others had shared about her father.

Ditlevson was in Washington Court House in Fayette County Nov. 17 to testify on behalf of the university in a case of estate planning, when he had a heart attack. Ditlevson passed away during the life flight to Riverside Hospital.

Another quote read during the service stated: “He died the way he lived – helping others.”

Ditlevson was born June 27, 1946, in Wisconsin. He graduated from Ottawa University in 1968 with a degree in English and communications, and he earned his master’s from Kansas University in Buffalo, where he studied developmental psychology. In 1992, he became director of legacy giving at AU.

Ditlevson’s job at AU was fitting; he spent his work days helping people plan their gifts, and he spent his life giving to others.

In addition to putting 110 percent into his job, Ditlevson was a Sunday school teacher and a little league coach.

An international student from AU spoke about her personal experience with Ditlevson near the end of the service; with tears in her eyes, she expressed her gratitude for the way he had opened his home to her and other international students at AU.

Finks shared stories of Ditlevson’s work at AU during the service.

Ditlevson was dedicated to his job in a way Finks said no one had been prior to his joining the office of legacy-giving. Ditlevson was one of the top six people in his field, according to Finks.

Perhaps the reason was his noteworthy intelligence and his willingness to share his knowledge and wisdom with others. He typically went above and beyond when asked for help.

Another quote read during the service said: “If you asked Paul what time it is, he’d tell you how to build a clock.”

Perhaps another reason Ditlevson was so successful was his focus on the individual; Finks noted – with respect – Ditlevson’s devotion to “fighting for” the individual over the university, if that’s what it came down to.

Ditlevson brought well-polished people skills to his work. Finks joked about his talkative nature during the service, but applauded his ability to listen as well.

Finks said it took Ditlevson 1,000 words to say what most people would say in 100, and added that he could engage anyone in a conversation about anything.

Johnson said he overheard someone put it another way: “The problem with Paul being in Heaven with God is that now Jesus will have to work to get a word in edgewise.”

Finks read quotes from Ditlevson’s many colleagues.

“His legacy will be in the hearts of the many people he worked with,” Vice President for Development Tom Seddon said.

Another colleague shared with Finks the story of when he planned to propose to his wife Kathy: “I’ve never seen him so happy. They became their own grape bunch.”

Paul, Kathy and all of the kids bring the total of “grapes” to 24 with one more growing, but many people felt welcomed into the family by Ditlevson’s generosity.

One woman who spoke about the memorial service said her daughter Mary had married into the Ditlevson family, and Paul welcomed both of them with open arms.

“He unofficially adopted my daughter because she needed a dad, and he unofficially adopted me because I just needed a family,” she said.

Another in-law shared similar feelings, adding that Ditlevson called him “son.”

“I am humbled to stand here wearing one of his ties and married to one of his crown jewels,” he said.

But the size of the bunch does nothing to diminish the effect of losing one person when that person is as loved as Ditlevson was.

“When we learned of his death, there was an eerie silence on campus,” Finks said.

Johnson closed the service by inviting attendees to share a story from their memories of Paul Ditlevson.

One woman pointed out that Ditlevson was “a hard worker, but he was not a workaholic.” Some might think the two descriptions are the same, but Ditlevson proved it’s possible to balance work, family and all aspects of life.